Mistress prokrastiniert eine Stunde für einen Telefonanruf.
More than being told that she is great and beautiful, Mistress wants to be seen the way she is. (It is flattering though and lovely to hear.)
Mistress leaves the house without a coat this morning for the first time this year.
When Mistress spends her evening home, it often looks like this.
Favourite clothes and getting things forward and baking a cake and drawing.
Mistress was good until breakfast. Then everything took too long and her eyeliner smudged the wrong way and when she finally, finally would be ready to leave she noticed she forgot her macbook charger at university yesterday. In another city.
And a big job to solve today. And her birthday coming up. And that itchy feeling in her throat that might means getting a cold (or not). And the lines she wants to draw don’t come out clearly, either.
Also, in Warsaw Mistress stepped into dog poop twice.
Some days, you need songs like blankets to wrap yourself in. One of Mistress’ friends moves to what feels like the farthest place there is and they won’t see each other before she leaves.
Mistress has always preferred doing things alone than not at all. She has been going to concerts on her own forever. Yesterday a friend left her wondering, saying this sounded sad. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it isn’t. There is magic and sadness in doing things alone.
Mistress knows that it’s not true, still – the 3+ years she has been working from home feel like hiding now.
One of the things on Mistress’ list this year is to re-read all Harry Potter books. Finished n°1 today and cried a little.
Mistress hasn’t been drawing for ages. She moved. The new home makes a happy heart. Her grandma died and it got clouded again. Now she tries to get back to a pattern.
Mistress wants to go to a market in the afternoon but needs to get some illustration work done before. The rain outside sets the mood to a calm november sunday. Mistress’ mind is overshadowed by what happened in Paris friday night – and what happens in Europe, like, building (kind of) fences and closing borders. This scares her.
PS: Wondering if the train connection to Munich is still down? Just another thing that happened and that disconnects neighbouring countries. Allies. A Union.
During summer, Mistress loves wearing the same dresses over and over. Right now, it sucks wearing the same sweaters all the time for not freezing.
Mistress easily shows her home on the internet: On her blog. The ikea magazine. Recently even the TV was in for a visit*. But she worries about taking someone home. Makes her feel a) lonely and b) totally stupid.
*Coming pretty soon
Keeping some precious time off to live and wonder and not being overwhelmed.
Right now, work is more about meetings and decisions than doing the work. After a few days at home, Mistress is back to her regular Wing Chun training. The kindest people and so much motivation ♥
Again, looking for a routine for the weeks to come.
These days, when Mistress can’t fall asleep, she wishes that something real would happen. (Can someone please take away my phone and hold me tightly till I sleep?)
You can listen to Lost Name’s «Forward», too. It’s been on my mind all day. —via Melodica Festival Vienna
There’s one step left / then I will break / just one step forward / just one mistake
Saturday morning: Mistress is listening to the Shirley Bassey record she got from her dad and gives her everyday bike a little makeover.
Mistress needs something to make her look and feel strong and beautiful.
It is night again. Mistress goes for a walk, fighting the headache left from new years eve. She spent it with kind, lovely & cool people in Vienna.